Isaac.

When you have almost the exact schedule everyday life can become so routine and regular – I just get in the rhythm of doing everything – and then something happens that reminds me, "Oh yeah, I’m living in Africa!" For example, a few days ago one of the 10 year old boys here I’m close to – Isaac – killed a huge crow by throwing a stone at it while it fly by. Isaac followed the bird until it fell and then proceeded to strut around with it while all the other boys followed. I laughed so hard, it seemed like I was in Peter Pan watching the Lost Boys. Isaac saw me and pretended to throw the bird at me as it was still crooking & weezing out its last breathes. I asked what he was going to do with the bird, he said, “Eat it! It’s meat!” We haven’t had meat in a few weeks (God bless the person who donates for meat once a month to the home by the way!) and I wondered if he really would eat it. I didn’t have to wait long. The boys took the bird behind a shed and curiosity drove me to follow. They ripped the wings off and started playing with them like toys. Then they ripped the legs off and defeathered them to expose the meat. As I was working up the courage to hold a leg one of the boys was offering to me, I saw Isaac take an axe and chop the bird’s head off. It was that moment I it really struck me – “Yep, I’m living in Africa!” Can you imagine seeingsomeone do this on the streets of Marietta? Haha, how much I wish I could bring all these boys back home with me! So anyway, the boys continued to drain the blood and defeather the bird like pros. That is when I realized there were totally serious about eating it. Unfortunately I was called away to help somewhere else so I am not sure exactly what happened after this – but I do know all the boys arrived about 15 minutes late to Bible Study with huge grins on their faces –whatever they had just done they thought was totally worth the scolding they got for being late.

Isaac, like many of the boys here, was a street child. He was able to survive by stealing & sniffing glue. The bottom of his feet are burned horribly because the boys would steal and then run through places on the street where there was fire because the police would never run through the fire after them. Its so hard and heartbreaking to imagine all that Isaac, and the other street children, have gone through. Many of them shared one blanket with holes in it and used rocks for pillows at night. Abandoned on their own in the streets of cities where even I am afraid to walk alone at night as an adult. When Isaac first arrived at the home he was so high off glue he jumped off the boys dorm (then one story) thinking he could fly. All the staff said they thought he was dead as he landed on a pile of huge stones, but he walked away without a scratch. Apparently he used to also steal cokes from the duka and then use the bottles to hit some of the other boys. As I look into his eyes now I can barely imagine him doing these things. Everyday he runs up to me and jumps on my back or gives me a hug. He is so loving, so sweet, so tender. He always makes sure to share, whether he has just killed a bird or is playing a game with the other kids. I really love this boy so much and can’t imagine having to leave him – but I praise my God who will always be with Isaac!

Whenever I visit the cities here as see the street children, I see his face in every begging boy and I can’t help but pray and give. Looking at his smiling face I’m struck with awe as I literally see God’s loving pursuit and redemption of His children so clearly. The Lord has so clearly sung His love over Isaac’s life and shown Himself as Savior! Isaac is always so proud and eager to share in Bible Study – speaking with a confidence that humbles me daily: “Yes, I totally understand God loved me first and I didn’t deserve it” and “I want to live everyday for God and never do anything again that breaks His heart again” and “Can we pray for the other street children and people who don’t know God’s love?” As you read this today I hope you are reminded of how much God loves you! We are all Isaacs, in desperate need of a Loving Savior & Mighty Redeemer. And our God is mighty to save! All praise, glory, and honor to our King!!!

(Baby Hope update: We finally found a trustworthy doctor to test her for HIV as that is a big reason babies are abandoned here - SHE IS NEGATIVE PRAISE GOD! Also, 6 months worth of support has been raised and she is up on the Heart for Africa site for sponsorship PRAISE JESUS. She is healthy, she is happy, and most importantly she is in His hands - thank you for your prayers and love for her!)

Luxuries.

I remember when Gaylyn was talking with me on how much money I would need to raise for my time in Africa. We were sitting outside Café Paris sipping coffee, chatting, and watching all the cars go buy in a Publix parking lot – wow that world seems so far away to me now! Anyway, she had said after airfare I would only need to raise $10 a day for the necessities – food, water, shelter. Then she said, “And if you want the luxuries like soap and toilet paper and things, maybe $12 a day is a good goal.” I think I choked alittle sipping my coffee. I had never before thought of soap & toilet paper as luxuries. To me luxuries were things like nice cars, an iPOD, a new dress for a dance or Easter, going to an IMAX movie, a week at the beach – not soap or toilet paper. You need those things to stay clean!

Fortunately I was able to raise enough money that I not only continue to use toilet paper and soap – but also toothpaste, sunscreen, bugspray, shampoo, a cell phone, a flashlight, a towel, a razor, laundry soap, daily vitamins, hand sanitizer, internet, and contact solution. Even once or twice a week I buy a coke or a piece of fruit to add a little variety in my diet when I can walk to the duka (tiny store – like a booth made with sticks and mud on the side of the road where they sell small things). I still laugh thinking how this list looks like such a normal grocery list from my life in the States. But now I have a better understanding – to most people in the world, these items are luxuries. The children’s home here is at least able to provide every child & staff member with a toothbrush, a towel, soap for the bucket shower, and soap for laundry. But I see them struggling when it comes to toilet paper, flashlights (remember some nights we don’t have electricity so it is DARK after about 7:30), daily vitamins, and toothpaste. And then there are the poor people beyond our walls who have not been saved from poverty yet, these items are more than luxuries to our most of our neighbors – they are impossibilities. Something only the “rich” can afford. Can you imagine?

I remember talking to so many youth back home who think they are poor because their parents can’t buy a North Face jacket every year, or nice car for them or spend as much money on their birthday party as you would see on Sweet Sixteen. The fact is – if we have food to eat everyday, clean water, access to health care, clothes, and shelter – in the world’s eyes we are rich. That means even us here at Tumaini – we are rich. The home still has struggles by our standards, don’t get me wrong. Struggles in providing school fees for their high schoolers & 2 university students. Struggles in providing nourishing foods for the children. Some days we have water and electricity – some days we don’t. But one of the biggest shifts for me in my thinking is changing from seeing this as a home of the poor (by East Cobb standards) to a home of the rich (by the world’s standards).

So here are God’s standards on which I hope to live not only the rest of my time in Africa by, but the rest of my life. That is the big challenge I think – how will I live when I go back home? I still use soap and toilet paper and look forward a family vacation and cheeseburgers again. While I hope the Lord doesn’t call me to lay those things down, I pray even more that if He does I will do so cheerfully knowing He has a greater purpose. We know money is not evil – I have seen peoples donations do so much good here. But the love of money – that is the one that creeps into our minds and hearts and deceives us. I pray the Lord will always help me keep my heart PURE and I would realize everything I have is a gift from HIM and He calls me to be a good steward of His blessings. This not only includes sharing things – honestly, more important is to share our knowledge, love, and relationship of Jesus with others. My prayer right now is no matter where I live in the world, I will always live by these two scriptures:

“But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. But food and clothing, we will be content with that. People who want to get rich fall into temptation and a trap and into many foolish and harmful desires that plunge men into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs.” – 1 Timothy 6:6-10

“Two things I ask you O Lord…give me neither poverty nor riches, but give me only my daily bread. Otherwise I might have too much and disown you and say, “Who is Lord?” Or I may become poor and steal, and so dishonor the name of my God.” – Proverbs 30:7-9

I also pray for me (and everyone reading this) not to be blinded by physical need so much that we forget about spiritual need. I see people here living off of spiritual food everyday – where there are people at home eating at Chilis or Moes who are spiritually dead. We can never forget, brothers and sisters, this world is not our home. Please, always have compassion on the poor & starving – but also always have compassion on those spiritually starving or dead. God’s love is real – and it saves us from a fate worse than anything we can experience on this earth.

Praying & Trusting.

Honestly, I was very discouraged after my last post. I don’t even want to write now, but I have this heavy burden I can’t shake to share with everyone back home. If for know other reason than to help you understand & call God’s people to constant prayer. Great way to start a post I now - know everyone really wants to read! Haha, oh well I'm just trying to be honest. After my last blog asking for support for a baby literally abandoned on the streets, I got a lot of “we are praying for you – you are doing a great job” messages. And right now I wish I could add: and all the money to support baby Hope was raised! But I can’t – not even $5 was offered to help this child from back home. I’m really struggling right now. I feel stuck between two worlds: East Cobb and East Africa.

One side of me says: the people back home have already sacrified their money to get me here – how can I ask for more? I can see God moving so much – I know I am called to be here. So many children have given their lives to Christ because they’ve never had anyone tell them there is a difference between attending Bible Study & Church and accepting Jesus in their hearts. The Lord brought me here to do that – I am humbled – I am grateful – I am joyful. To hold crying children, speak the Lords love over them and they don’t have to fear abuse or hunger anymore. The Lord is good! 67 of the 87 children at Tumaini have sponsors – and enough other donors have given that we have clean water, our own school (so primary education can be provided even for the ones without sponsors), electricity most days, and every child has atleast 2 outfits and a pair of shoes. Praise Jesus for how He is saving these children from poverty and hopelessness! Truly He is giving them a hope and a future full of His goodness!

My other side cries: the people here outside our walls are so desperate. So many sick from dirty water. So many without proper clothes or food. So many without school fees. So many who can’t afford medicine when their children are sick – so they watch helplessly as their children die. People I’ve met like Alice – a single mom who is one of the cooks here. She works everyday (7 days a week) 5am-9pm – and she is grateful! She is constantly sick from the smoke and hoping one day to start her own salon so she won’t always be sick and can have alteast 2 hours each night to spend with her children. But to raise the funds to start that is almost impossible for her – she is barely getting by now. How will she save? What future do these people have? If I were to beg everyone at home to empty their savings accounts there would still not be enough money. Lord, why are there so many suffering? Lord, why do the poor always have to be with us? Lord, why can’t I fix it all? Lord, why don’t YOU fix it all? What is the purpose? I’m begging you to keep my heart from the anger rising inside of me. I know you are not cruel. I know you are loving. I know Your ways are better than my ways. Help me Lord, my heart and mind are desperate to understand why this deep pain & poverty exist. Save us Lord. Give us Hope. Give us Love. Give the hungry food, the thirsty clean water, and the sick healing. Give us You. You provided manna from the sky and water from rocks for your people in the desert– bring such a revolution again to Your people in Kenya.

The Kenyan people have so much hope and joy I’m humbled daily. Allow me to share with you about a widow who lives near Tumaini – her grandchildren come here for day school and I just love this family. I was blessed to visit a home Heart for Africa is building for her to move into. I have watched a group of widows dancing and shouting praises to God because a home was provided for one of their poorest – I danced and sang too. Then they took me to her current home. I wouldn’t call it a home, I’d call it a walk in closet. She slept their with her two grandchildren on potato sacks. The same room to cook, use the bathroom (hole in the corner but no water to flush), and sleep. She’s lived this way for 10 years since her husband died. I wonder if the Lord called me to live that way for 10 years if I would still sing His praises? I want to say yes. Right now honestly I’m too scared to pray for this kind of faith because then I fear the Lord will put my in the same situation to grow my faith. Lord, forgive my weaknesses. I have a video of them singing I hope to post next time I travel into town where the internet is strong enough.

Please – this is not another cry for more money from your wallets. After hearing nothing for Hope I decided not to post anymore specific needs and their costs. That is not the purpose of this blog. The purpose of this blog is to connect people to the experiences I’m having as I walk this crazy road with Jesus. I have written down a list of the biggest needs I’ve seen here – 7 things – and I am only speaking to My King about them. Please, pray with me. The overall themes I ask for prayers is for God’s love to heal every broken heart and for salvation of the people here. Pray that God will save the other children who have not been rescued from the streets or abusive homes to be saved soon. And also please pray with me that the other homes that are struggling so much would grow in favor like Tumaini. If you feel called to give I would certainly be joyful to help you do so – but I’m done trusting in American wallets. Please don’t be offended, I am truly grateful for the money already sacrificed…I wouldn’t be here if people back home hadn’t already financially supported me – and I was able to raise alittle extra so I can atleast met a few needs of the people here. I’m trusting in God of the Universe, the Great Love, the Savior, the King to hear my cries and to provide. He answers prayers. Maybe to my American way of thinking the answers seem too slow – but if He is as loving and powerful as I know He is – I know He will. I have seen the Lord do so much – how can I lose faith now? I refuse to lose faith. I refuse to let Satan manipulate me to be angry or hopeless. As Christians we are not victims of the world, we are VICTORS. And I have the Victory of Jesus Christ inside me! Heaven on earth Lord – please bring it soon!

HOPE

As I was praying about the new direction God was calling me in my life, the theme & word of HOPE came up over & over. The word came over and over in my prayers and in Scriptures I was reading. Even one of the most tangible ways was while I was serving on a Student Mission Trip to Ecuador, asking Jesus how I could prepare for my time coming up to serve in Africa, a high-school student made me a bracelet of leftover wire we were using to build the second floor of a school with the word HOPE. Then I found out the children’s home I was going to was named Tumaini, which is HOPE in Swahili. But upon arriving at Tumaini, I found the Lord also had another reason I was to pray for Hope.

We both arrived the same day at Tumaini Children’s Home in Kenya, but both have very different stories. I arrived showered, well-fed, healthy, with clean clothes and 2 suitcases full of luggage. She arrived dirty, hungry, sick, with nothing but a urine-soaked outfit and a blanket. My arrival had been long awaited, and I was so smiling and happy to finally arrived to live with the children and staff I had been praying about for so long. Her arrival was a complete surprise, and she couldn’t stop crying as she was surrounded by strange & unknown faces.

You see Hope arrived an abandoned baby literally found in a ditch by one of the schoolchildren who was walking home (Tumaini also has a school that people of the community can pay to send their children to help the home in financial support). The police were contacted and told to bring her to our home for a few days until they could either track down her family or take her to a baby home. Normally this home only has ages 2-18, but looking into her precious face the staff could not refuse. New clothes, blankets, medicine, and diapers were donated by the staff members. The staff women & older girls at the home take turns feeding, playing, cleaning, and sleeping with the child as she is so young she requires constant 24-7 care. Watching the older girls, many who have never known love from their own mothers, loving on this baby girl seems to me to be one of the most beautiful and awe-inspiring ways I have seen Jesus’ love radiating from people. The staff & older girls have sacrificed their own money to provide food, medicine, and diapers for Hope these past two and half weeks. They have also sacrificed their work/school breaks to take care of her. They have given so lovingly. Hope now has a smile on her face so many times and is finally starting to look a healthy weight and overcoming sickness from all the love and care she has been shown by Tumaini Children’s Home. But there is an issue of custody & finances. I’m told the home can apply for custody of the child from the courts rather easily, but to do so they need to know they can support this child’s food, clothing, education, and medical care long-term financially. To fully financially support Hope – for clothes, blankets, caretakers, medical care, shelter, and education when she is old enough - $120 a month is needed. The staff of this home have already given so much, but they are unable to give this amount long-term as so many are suffering themselves to provide food & education for their own children. If anyone can sponsor her fully, partially, or even just give a onetime donation towards her care please email me at sblovesjesus@gmail.com Maybe you can only pledge a one time donation of $120, or you can pledge $20 a month for her – everything helps! If you are unable to give financially, please I ask you to pray for this precious one, that God would provide a loving home for her to grow up in and that she will not get lost in the corrupt government system or worse end up back on the streets. OUR GOD IS A GOD WHO PROVIDES! He has provided for me, He has provided for you, and now let us join together as the body of Christ to pray He will continue to provide for this precious seven month old child.

“For I was hungry and you gave me food. I was thirsty and you gave me drink. I was a stranger and you welcomed me. I was naked and you clothed me...And the King will respond, “Truly I say to you, whatever you did to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me.” – Matthew 25: 35-40